Secrets to Better Body Language That Will Upgrade Your Interview

By Shea Ki

Do you know that your body language often communicates more to others than what you actually say? Your words might be saying you are qualified and enthusiastic about the job, but your gestures, posture, handshake, and facial expressions may be telling a different story. This could blow your chances when you are in the hot seat. 
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In a tech saturated world, it's common to be more comfortable communicating from behind a screen rather than talk about our value in person. It's a problem that is getting worse instead of better. So it is no wonder you can quickly find body language tips on everything from bad habits we do with our hands to better eye contact with a simple google search. But why does so much negative body language still happen--especially when someone is under pressure?

Stress before and during an interview can pile up quickly. You might think you are hiding it pretty well, but your body language will be the first to tell on you. It's not something you can fix overnight with only a list of good tips that you read or talks that you watch on YouTube. 

In this second part of my blog series on The Upgrade My Interview™ method, I am sharing with you ways to get in tune with what message your body language is communicating. 

1. Observe, Move, & Practice More
​When we have too much nervous energy, it looks for ways to get out of our body. Twirling hair with your fingers, tapping your feet, or other fidgeting do not make a positive impression. But how can we stop these nervous habits? Getting out of our head where we tend to overthink and get more anxious is a must for a successful interview.

With interview skills coaching, you can be trained to use your body to bring you into a calmer state before a stressful performance. I would be honored to help you with a coaching session, but you can also start taking these smaller steps to increase the power of your body language.

• Start observing others around you. Begin with watching people at work or even at home (but not in a stalker way, of course). What do you begin to notice? Now try it at a place where you are less familiar with the people. Perhaps next time you are eating out at a restaurant, see how many nonverbal messages of the waiter you can notice before they even speak. What are their facial expressions, hand gestures, and posture telling you?

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• ​Find your groove. What makes you feel like moving? Even better, what makes you feel like dancing? If you have an interview coming up, be sure to allow yourself time to do activities that get you moving (nature walk, cardio class, taking the stairs more often) or shaking out (qoya, bellydancing, kundalini yoga) your stored up nervous energy. That's right, you need more BREAKS from your computer, job search, or other responsibilities that are keeping you still. Movement releases stored-up tension so your shoulders, neck and back are less likely to crunch up at the interview.

 

• Practice and challenge yourself. How can you expect to give a firm handshake or appropriate eye contact if you have not recently practiced? I see big changes in confidence and body language from clients I coach who ask me to set up and do a mock interview. Whoever you practice your mock interview with, be sure that it is set up to feel as close to the real deal as possible.

You can also make boosting your body language fun by making it a challenge. For seven days, set your alarm on your phone for every hour to remind you gently that it's time to re-align your posture, take some deep breaths, and shake out any nervous energy if needed. After a week of this practice, you'll notice that better body language becomes easier and more natural. Repeating these types of challenges when you have an interview coming up will also serve you well.

Your efforts to upgrade the message your body language is sending out will pay off with major benefits in the world of work.

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2. Strengthen & Engage Your Core

Those visits to the gym or doing Youtube exercise videos will pay off more than you might realize. You don't need a six pack to impress at the interview, but a stronger core will boost your body language. Notice how often during your work day you and others are slouching. Look around you right now. Are most people sitting with hunched shoulders and a rounded posture?

It's easy to think, "Well, I wouldn't sit like that at an interview, of course. I would straighten up for that moment." But we can't expect that overnight our bodies will be strong enough to hold a confident posture. It takes time, but the good news is you can begin working on it right away. 

On days that working out seems like such a chore to go do, it helps me to remember the benefits. Did you know that routinely working out your core muscles will make it easier for you to keep this key area engaged when you are in an interview? Pilates, sit-ups, and kickboxing have been my go-tos! These core-focused types of activities help me keep my shoulders more at ease, instead of tense and falling into a slouch when I am under pressure.

​The benefit of better posture that you get from a strong core will help you send a powerful, nonverbal message that you are confident and prepared.

3. Bring Your Mood Boosters
How can you keep your intention of keeping positive body language from being sabotaged? As you are practicing and preparing for your interview, give yourself time to see which of these tips are most helpful to increasing your mood in the moment. 

• Spend three minutes thinking of a vacation or the details of other happy memories. You can use any images in your mind as long as they make you want to do the opposite of frowning, slouching, fidgeting, or crossing your arms in defense. 
• Instead of checking social media while waiting your turn, look at a group of pictures on your phone that make you smile when you look at them. 
• Amy Cuddy's world-famous (and recently somewhat controversial) research about power poses are still working like a charm for me. You can gain more benefits of holding a power pose IF this is something you practice as part of your interview prep-routine. 
• When you notice you may be tapping your feet, twirling your hair, or other fidgeting, don't let that frustrate you. It's a positive that you noticed it. Now you can begin to pay more attention to deepening your breath. Try to inhale for four seconds and exhale for three seconds. Then try three seconds for the in breath and four for the exhale if you can and if it feels good. This gives your mind something helpful and soothing to do rather than create more nervous energy in your body.

Being mindful and in control of your body language takes practice and patience, but it is key to avoiding a negative first impression.
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Did you find this advice for better body language helpful? Share this blog post with a friend who you believe in and want to see shine in the hot seat. 

Your turn: What tip will you be trying out to boost your body language? Post your comment in the reply box below.

Most of all, believe in you.

Shea Ki is a holistic Career Coach on a mission to end the interview struggle. Find out more about her coaching packages so you can shine in the hot seat and attract work that lights you up. 

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